Call me MISTER Rackham

My pirate name is:

Morty Rackham

You have the good fortune of having a good name, since Rackham (pronounced RACKem, not rack-ham) is one of the coolest sounding surnames for a pirate. Arr!

Get your own pirate name from fidius.org.

Oh yeah, I'm just that cool.

Man... I really ought to do some homework or something.